Redefining Fertility Radio Show with Sue Dumais

Fertility is very misunderstood and negatively portrayed in media today. Many women deal with this deeply emotional life experience in isolation because people in their life just “don’t get it”. I am passionate about creating awareness and educating others about fertility so that women and couples all over the world can find the support they so desperately seek. It is time to start a global conversation to help redefine fertility and empower women through this challenging life experience.

I want every woman who is struggling to conceive to realize that they are not alone and that their fertility does not have to define who they are. In fact, by redefining fertility you can transform your experience of it all together. Imagine moving from a place of confusion and desperation to a place of empowerment, HOPE and FAITH. I want you to feel inspired to live each day without putting your life on hold. I will help you discover limiting thoughts and beliefs that may be interfering with your ability to conceive and you will learn simple and effective mind body tools to help you transform your fertility journey. You can be a Mother! I believe in you, and I will help you believe in your Self.

Sue Dumais' Redefining Fertility

Radio Show is hosted by

The WIN - Women's Information Network.

To listen to the show click here

Everything is Perfect, Including You!

I wanted to share this inspirational video on perfection. I understand that when you are going through your fertility journey it is common to focus on what isn't working, what's wrong and who's to blame. This creates confusion, questioning and doubt. Many couples begin to blame their body, question their relationship and some even believe they are being punished.

What if there was nothing wrong? What if all that was happening at this time had a deeper meaning that you don't yet have in your awareness? What is everything was perfect?What if there was nothing wrong with you and that you were PERFECT just the way you are?

I have learned from Paul Martinelli and Les Brown that "we are born perfect but programmed for failure". I lead a Fertility Support Group last night and there was discussion around stats and others opinions about your fertility. No one knows what you need! No one else truly knows why you are experiencing this life challenge. Only you can discover that for your SELF.

Drop the labels like "unexplained infertility". It is not your Truth! It is a label that western medicine uses to describe someone that has been through all the testing they have available to them and everything has come back as normal. It is only "unexplained" in their eyes and you need to realize that their perspective is only one small piece of your fertility puzzle.

Finding meaning on your fertility journey will help you transform your experience of it. We often can look back at an experience and recognize why something happened. In hindsight, we can appreciate the lesson, learning or gifts that occurred as a direct result. What is one thing you learned about your Self or your relationship through your fertility experience that you wouldn't have otherwise discovered?

You are perfect in every way! You are a beautiful, vibrant, fertile being! Breathe it in and receive this message with your whole heart!



You Are Perfect Motivational Inspirational Video from Paul Martinelli on Vimeo.

Forgiveness & Fertility

What does forgiveness really have to do with fertility? Everything! In fact, forgiveness is about every area of your life. You cannot separate forgiveness because it affects your entire being - physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. As I have mentioned several times I am participating in an Empowerment Mentorship program with Les Brown and Paul Martinelli. The last 2 weeks I have been avoiding the lesson on forgiveness. My EGO would say "I do forgiveness everyday. I don't have anything else to forgive." That is my way of avoiding. Interestingly I can't ignore or avoid anything for any length of time without it showing up in my body as discomfort and eventually, if I leave it too long, pain.

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It is not about anyone else but YOU! Unforgiveness is a toxin in your body that will continue to poison you until you make a conscious effort to forgive and let go. Forgiveness is not about proving right or wrong, in fact, it is not about anyone else. While you may need to forgive another person for what they said or did to you, the act of forgiveness is giving you freedom to take back your power.

When I reflect back on my miscarriage I remember being so angry with the Universe for taking my baby from me. Then I was angry with my Self. After working on several levels of forgiveness I realized I was angry with my baby for leaving. Of course as soon as I became aware of that, I turned from anger to guilt for even thinking that thought. The pain and resentment showed up as tension in my lower belly and pelvis. There can be many layers to forgiveness and depending on the circumstances you may need to forgive in layers. In other situations it is as simple as making a conscious choice to forgive.

Many of my clients hold resentment toward a doctor for treating them poorly or for not being empathic to their emotions around fertility. Some are angry with friends and family for the lack of support, for not "getting it" and perhaps for unsupportive comments that felt hurtful or insulting. Some have trouble forgiving themselves for their past and decisions that they continue to carry guilt and shame around, such as an abortion when they were younger. Whatever it is, those negative emotions are a toxin in your body that will cause unnecessary tension in your body and lead to pain and other health issues.

These are three pillars of forgiveness that I learned in my training with Paul Martinelli that was based on the teachings of the Dalai Lama.

1. Separate the person from the behaviour. If you can see yourself forgiving the person not the behaviour you might find it easier. When I was sexually abused as a child it was difficult to let go of my attachment to the pain and suffering it caused so I blamed the individuals for a long time. When I separated the behaviour from the individual I became more compassionate. My dialogue became "Wow they must have experienced some deep pain in their life to do that to a 5 year old child."  Forgiveness doesn't mean what they did was right, it is about letting go of the resentment and taking your power back.

2. Recognize that you don't know the whole Truth. You can create a story of why they did what they did but you really have no idea and in many cases neither do they. Many people have trouble dealing with their own pain so they project it on others. Many people live their life in fear and have no idea how to love. Let go of the story you are telling yourself and take ownership for your feelings. This is where you take back control.

3. Ask for help releasing the toxin of unforgiveness. Whether you write a poem, a letter (that you don't send), pray, blog, release the pain and resentment to the universe or God for healing. Whatever you need to do to let go. Just know that you don't have to do it all alone! There are others out there to support you.

I invite you to look at your life and see if there is an area or someone you need to forgive. If you need help with the process feel free to contact me or leave a comment. You are not alone! We all need to forgive so perhaps if we join together and each week commit to forgiving one thing or one person we can support each other as we slowly step back into our personal power.